Sunday, September 21, 2008

Alabama 49, Arkansas 14

UPDATED & BUMPED: Butch Bornt, who describes himself as president of the "Restraining Order Wing of the Sela Ward Fan Club," e-mails to remind us that the Hollywood hottie was a Crimson Tide cheerleader back in the day (center in this photo):

Meanwhile, Instapundit is getting e-mail taunts after his Vols lost 30-6 to Florida. An amazing thing, when you think about it. We are at war with murderous jihadis, the economy teeters on the verge of collapse and polls show that Barack Obama may be the next president of the United States, but if you're an SEC football fan, your mood is far more dependent on how your team did on Saturday.

I'm prepared to predict that Tennessee fans will be profoundly depressed after Oct. 25. (If you want to avoid that downer, Professor, I'll be happy to take those tickets off your hands.)

In addition to football, the SEC is also a powerhouse of blog taunting. Which reminds me, why hasn't UGA alum Mary Katharine Ham started taunting me about next week's game yet? Doesn't the Weekly Standard allow football taunting?

Roll, Tide, Roll!

Alabama (4-0) led 35-7 at halftime, and six of the Crimson Tide's seven touchdowns covered at least 25 yards.
Giving up two touchdowns is bad -- the defense has already allowed three touchdowns this season -- but I'll take it for a conference opener. Imagine those poor Arkansas fans having to hear the mighty Million Dollar Band play this song seven times in one game!

Yea, Alabama!

Yea, Alabama! Drown 'em Tide!
Every 'Bama man's behind you,
Hit your stride.
Go teach the Bulldogs to behave,
Send the Yellow Jackets to a watery grave.
And if a man starts to weaken,
That's a shame!
For Bama's pluck and grit have
Writ her name in Crimson flame.
Fight on, fight on, fight on, men!
Remember the Rose Bowl we'll win then.
So roll on to victory,
Hit your stride,
You're Dixie's football pride, Crimson Tide!

Hey, now,what's that whining sound I hear coming from over 'round Athens, Georgia? Sounds like some 'Dawgs who know they're about to get stomped by a herd of wild elephants!

Georgia is ranked No. 3, but some folks in Athens say the Bulldogs should be No. 2. That's right. And 'Bama's gonna beat the No. 2 out of them 'Dawgs

UPDATE: Compare and contrast the University of Alabama and the University of Georgia: 'Nuff said.


  1. You know you used to work with a Georgia cheerleader?

    Anyhoo ... as a 5-year resident of Georgia who became a Bulldogs fan during the height of Steve Superior era at Florida ... bwahahahahaha ...

    You beat a Darren McFadden-less Arkansas team and now you think this Crimson Swell team is the second coming of the Bear? So you get to be undefeated going into your first real SEC game. Being undefeated did Hawaii a fat lot of good going into the Sugar Bowl last year, didn't it?

    Oh, pardon my manners ... the Sugar Bowl ... that's the game in New Orleans where the SEC champ (mostly) plays each year. Forgive my rudeness for assuming a Crimson Drip fan would recognize that reference, given the dim memories you must have of the Sugar Bowl, having last played there about 10 coaches ago during the first Bush administration. Since then, the Dawgs have rang in the New Year in New Orleans three times. In fact, both my Texas Longhorns and Notre Dame Fighting Irish have played in the Sugar Bowl more recently than the Crimson Ripple.

    Forget about the Bulldogs, Stacy, cuz your team hasn't got a prayer ... but don't despair. Maybe you lot will end your six-year losing streak to Auburn. Or maybe the Independence Bowl or Music City Bowl will take them AGAIN.

  2. My policy: Never exhange football taunts with cinema critics. This would be like me saying, "Ang Lee sucks! You call those movies? Huh! Where are the 'splosions, huh? Has Ang Lee ever made a REAL movie with Clint Eastwood or Charles Bronson or a CGI space alien? No, I didn't think so!"

  3. Please ... if I didn't consort with intellectual inferiors, where could I possibly go.

    But if I were trash-talking for Vanderbilt or Tulane or Louisiana-Lafayette, that pathetic analogy might hold. Instead, my favoring Georgia is an indication that taste and judgment go across multiple disciplines. Plus Ang Lee actually CAN be a great action director ... CROUCHING TIGER, anyone?

    As for your other smears, how could a supposed Tide fan possibly insult Uga after the most-famous photo in mascot history. And who is your mascot ... an elephant? Wtf is that? Is the team named the Pachyderms? Do you have an elephant on the sidelines? Wtf is that?

    And what's more ferocious -- an elephant or a bulldog? Elephants are frackin' vegetarians who lumber around at the zoo waiting to be fed peanuts (not even boiled peanuts), as opposed to a ferocious carnivore that kills its own food. The only way in elephant is a threat is if he accidentally runs over you while trying to stampede away in terror from something else.

    (BTW ... what do you get when you cross an elephant and a pit bull dog ... Sarah Palin).

  4. The Bayou Bengals beat Awburn on their home turf and the Horns rolled over Rice -- so I'm happy.

    However, this trash talk from a fan of a team that doesn't know a decent rivalry from a mud wrasslin event has no room to talk.

    Cocktail party? What the heck?

    I survived the first half of this decade in Alabama. I've seen rivalries before but nothing compares to the Iron Bowl.


    But I have to ask... When was the last time the Tide beat the Tigers?