ME: So, she's from Germany, huh?OK, I wasn't taking notes, so I can't swear that this is an exact transcript. Also, I can neither confirm nor deny the rumor that Smitty's wife was fondling my knee under the table. It might have been Smitty himself, for all I know . . .
SMITTY: Yeah, she came over in 2004.
ME: Cool. (To Mrs. Smitty) Better watch it. If you don't do right, he'll have you deported.
SMITTY: Too late for that. She's got a U.S. passport.
Earlier Tuesday, I covered a conference and subsequently hoovered up the hors d'ouervres at a reception, where I got still more sexy photos: Now, the lovely lady in this photo is one of the most enthusiastic conservative philanthropists in D.C., and I think you see why: By giving generously to conservative causes, she gets the chance to meet and mingle with some of the hottest young Republican guys in town, like this fellow with the scotch-on-the-rocks. And ladies, he's available!
Yes, lady blog-readers, that's right: Mr. V, as we shall call him, is single, successful and Republican. He is Catholic, holds a law degree, and is looking for a girl who is -- and I quote Mr. V himself -- "future First Lady material."
Want to hear more? Of course you do. Mr. V is 27, Italian on his father's side, Jewish on his mother's side, has a muscular physique and is 5-foot-8.
ME: So, you're looking for a girl maybe 5-3, 5-4?So, there you have it, ladies. If you're an unmarried Republican gal of exceptional moral character (and smokin' hotness), if you are between 5-foot-4 and 5-foot-6 tall, if you dream of being First Lady to the first Italian-Jewish President of the United States, then just leave a comment, and we'll try to hook you up. Because Mr. V is obviously so popular with the ladies . . .
MR. V: A little taller than that, maybe 5-6.
ME: Ah . . . .[snip]
MR. V: Not taller than me, but not too short. . . . Well, 5-4 would be OK, I guess.
Hey, what about Michelle Lee Muccio? Oh, that's right. I forgot. I introduced them at CPAC: Michelle's got to be at least 5-7, so Mr. V's probably not interested. Which means he's still fair game, ladies.
UPDATE: Apparently, Eric Cantor thought the Britney Spears concert was more important than the Obama press conference. Good call, I say!