Friday, March 27, 2009

Sham Ow!

by Smitty
Shlomi down from engaging in bad humor, but this is a test of the theory that all publicity is good publicity. The Sham Wow guy was
arrested last month on a felony battery charge following a violent confrontation with a prostitute in his South Beach hotel room. According to an arrest affidavit, Shlomi met Sasha Harris, 26, at a Miami Beach nightclub on February 7 and subsequently retired with her to his $750 room at the lavish Setai hotel. Shlomi told cops he paid Harris about $1000 in cash after she "propositioned him for straight sex." Shlomi said that when he kissed Harris, she suddenly "bit his tongue and would not let go." Shlomi then punched Harris several times until she released his tongue.
To follow the link and examine the mug shots, the experience was bad enough to turn him into Al Franken's younger sibling. Let us now consult Ancient Commenter Solomon:
Say unto wisdom, Thou art my sister; and call understanding thy kinswoman: that they may keep thee from the strange woman, from the stranger which flattereth with her words.
For at the window of my house I looked through my casement, and beheld among the simple ones, I discerned among the youths, a young man void of understanding, passing through the street near her corner; and he went the way to her house, in the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night:
And, behold, there met him a woman with the attire of an harlot, and subtil of heart. (She is loud and stubborn; her feet abide not in her house: Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner.)
So she caught him, and kissed him, and with an impudent face said unto him, I have peace offerings with me; this day have I payed my vows. Therefore came I forth to meet thee, diligently to seek thy face, and I have found thee. I have decked my bed with coverings of tapestry, with carved works, with fine linen of Egypt. I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon. Come, let us take our fill of love until the morning: let us solace ourselves with loves. For the goodman is not at home, he is gone a long journey: He hath taken a bag of money with him, and will come home at the day appointed.
With her much fair speech she caused him to yield, with the flattering of her lips she forced him. He goeth after her straightway, as an ox goeth to the slaughter, or as a fool to the correction of the stocks; till a dart strike through his liver; as a bird hasteth to the snare, and knoweth not that it is for his life.
Proverbs 7:4-23
Or, in this case, merely a bit of the tongue. Hat tip: Wallet Pop.

4 comments:

  1. I included him in a post last week.

    I guess "You're gonna love my nuts" now has some room for expansion.

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  2. @Steve,
    You claim your site is 'dedicated to fairness', but look what you did to Mr. Potatoehead!
    Tut, tut sir.
    (When first I saw your link, I thought I was late to the posting party.)

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  3. Back in 2004 the blog was started by a liberal brother of mine and included his twin sons (one is Troglopundit) and me. Since I am about the only one left posting, I would have changed that dedication to 'dedicated to laissez faire-ness' if I were its administrator.

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  4. I put up a post about Vince a few months back that was fairly popular on StumbleUpon: That Shamwow Guy Check it out.

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