Friday, October 17, 2008

Confession of an unlicensed journalist

Howard Wolfson was just on Fox News ranting that Joe the Plumber isn't licensed as a plumber by the state of Ohio.

This caused me untold heartache because, you see, I am an unlicensed journalist.

That's right: Although I have worked as a journalist since 1986, I have never been licensed to practice journalism in any state. So to all of those who may have been misled by this deceit -- including Howard Wolfson's former boss Hillary Clinton, whom I covered during the primary campaign -- I guess I owe you an apology.

Howard Wolfson also exposed another evil right-wing deception that relates directly to me. Like "Joe" Wurzelbacher (whose actually first name is Sam), I have been fraudulently going by my middle name since I was a baby. My first name is the same as my uncle Bobby, and so I have always been known to family and friends as Stacy. (In college, my nickname was "Spacey Stacy.")

While falsely passing myself off as journalist, however, I got in the habit of using my full name as a byline because if I wrote stories as "Stacy McCain," people would call the office and ask to speak to "her." And so even though I was a phony unlicensed journalist, my byline was accurate. It was the real me that was fake.

I guess it's only a matter of time now before the Federal Bureau of Blogging notices I haven't completed the proper paperwork.


  1. Isn't "Stacy" a girl's names anyway?

    Everyone knows girls can't be real journalists. Just look at Maureen Dowd and Katie Couric.

  2. I like folks who are, how shall we say, unofficial, because I are an unofficial writer myownself. We have lots of cool stuff to say. I'd like to have Joe the Plumber unstop two drains, pronto. B. Hussein Obama can pay the freight.