Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Hanna Rosin has guest-blogged her last

She dares defend circumcision while guest blogging at the site of the world's foremost foreskin fetishist, Andrew Sullivan.

"Male genital mutilation!" scream the connoisseurs of uncut, preservationists of the precious prepuce.

Get over it, people. Only porn freaks and gay men -- having ample opportunity to comparison shop, as it were -- obsess so fanatically over the difference. As I was taught in commercial design classes 30 years ago, form follows function, and familiarity with the fact of foreskinless functionality (i.e., I've fathered six kids) indicate my circumcised state is entirely adequate to the rigors of the task.

The advantages in terms of hygiene are well-known, and tend to be especially appreciated by mothers who have a difficult enough time getting boys to bath, much less to wash their winkies with health-conscious care. And it is certainly my impression -- based on comments whenever the subject is raised -- that women generally prefer what we might call the kosher pickle.

Those who prefer the sword-and-scabbard setup are perfectly entitled to their preference, without casting aspersions upon those of us who've forsaken the sheath and keep the blade ready. "Mutilation," indeed!

UPDATE 8/28: For those who can't get enough of this topic, The World's Most Idiotic Debate continues.


  1. If that was mutilation and mutilation was supposed to slow deliberation, I would hate to have been uncut. As for numb, I think if that occurs, it is a good thing. As for looks, come on, all of those parts are ugly. More or less skin will not a winky beautify. I don't just avoid looking in other stalls (unlike Sullivan?), I avoid looking to closely into my own, other than to make sure the gold is hitting the right pot.

    Oh, we weren't supposed to comment on this? Too personal and such. Oops.

  2. Stacy wrote: "form follows function."

    To paraphrase Diego Montoya, I do not think that phrase means what you think it does.

  3. As the mother of two boys (young men now) not having them circumsized would have made me derelict in my duties. That tool Sullivan is just freak among freaks on the left.

  4. Much more information that I needed to know.

    Jay Stevens

  5. For guys who complain about how they don't get the pleasure from sex while being circumsized vs. uncircumsized..

    On what do you base that on?

  6. I've repeatedly asked my husband of 21 years of marriage, if maybe we should slow down and give it (ITYKWIMAITYD)* a rest for awhile because of his traumatic circumcision just after birth... however, he doesn't seem bothered in the slightest and never has. Also, nary a nightmare sweat has been broken with regard to said trauma... go figure.


    *I had to look this shit up when I started reading your blog, can you believe it?

  7. There are no advantages to circumcision. Except that uncut guys think they're lucky that they don't have to wash their things very much. And who said that circumcision causes sterility? Attributing your 5 kids to circumcision is hu-bris! Of course, the woman who wants a rest from sex doesn't know that her husband needs all that extra stimulation because he doesn't have all the tools in his toolchest that he was supposed to have. This pro-circumcision giggle-fest makes me think you guys are afraid you're missing something.

  8. (First, a quick but necessary throw-away:)
    Choosing to circumcise or not circumcise remains your decision. I like to leave meddling one's personal business to the liberals.

    (Second, full disclosure:)
    I'm a physician, and yes... I'm uncircumcised.

    (Finally, the meat:)
    There is truth to the fact that if you circumcise a penis, it's less likely to create an environment favorable for disease or cancer to get a foothold. The same may be said of many such conditions. So for those of you fearing such ills as colon cancer, take heart! You're only a colectomy away from restful sleep. It can't go bad if you cut it off!

    Is it mutilation? Well, the foreskin was part of the initial male load-out. We choose to remove it. While it's not essential for function, applying the term "mutilation" to the procedure depends on who you ask. Start hacking off earlobes, and then poll people which term best applies.

    My 2 cents aside, I leave one suggestion: If you chose to circumcise your child you should be present for the procedure. In my experience, parents want no part of it. Ever wonder why? It's terrifying. The typical scenario is as follows: Your infant son is strapped down on an ergonomically designed plastic cradle (for comfort). No anesthesia is administered (given the risks of said anesthesia, although some topicals may be used to negligible effect). A metal or plastic device is clamped to the penis, and the foreskin is sliced away. Pressure, antiseptic, and dressing is applied. The child is returned to his family. Oh yeah, I forgot: During the entire episode, the child is terrified and typically shrieking in pain and fear. Sobbing and inconsolable, they struggle against their straps while you carve off everything that doesn't look like an elephant. You take comfort in the fact that they won't remember the episode. Even so, it's a challenge to not feel a moment's empathy for this defenseless being, ignorant of what's occurring, having sensitive chunks of skin removed without anesthesia.

    In short, it's your business. With or without, it probably won't affect your ability to father six kids. I'll leave the issue of complications for another time, so I can focus simply on this: If it's so vital and good for your child, at least be there. Of course, being present may change your mind.

  9. It's a religious thing. If you are not religious in those few religions that proscribe it, then FAGETABOUTIT. If there are any physical advantages or disadvantages about circumcision, then I really don't care, because it's not the reason for the BRIS.

  10. I have a penis and I like it. I just wish I had all that I was born with. But, that choice was removed during my routine infant circumcision.

    I am not the only one wishing for a foreskin. Many men also miss their foreskin. See to read accounts of men who wish they had never been circumcised and are doing something about it. These are normal men. But, they have learned the value of the foreskin and want one back.

  11. "those of us who've forsaken the sheath"

    That is the point. YOU haven't forsaken the sheath. Your parents gave the OK for some nurse to cut it off you.

    "women prefer the kosher pickle"

    What women? Women in the UK? Parisian girls? Italian girls? C'mon. Women generally don't care. The way I see it, just because it was done to you doesn't make it all right to do it to your son. It is his junk and his decision. You wouldn't give a nurse the OK to trim your infant daughter's least I hope not.

  12. I have three sons. When each was born we were asked- don't you want your boy's penis to look like your penis?

    What a stupid reason to do or believe in anything. I got them all in the shower about age 11, 9, and 7 and we had a frank and honest discussion about how I loved them enough to not have them mutilated just to look like me.

    That's the way I roll.