Friday, November 6, 2009

Bizarre news from Washington, D.C.

Sources tell me that a flock of ravens -- hundreds of them -- have taken up roost at 320 First Street, SE. The big black birds are said to be menacing passersby, causing a foul stench with their malodorous droppings, and startling schoolchildren who come to Capitol Hill for field trips.

The weirdest thing -- and this is a rumor so disturbing that I wouldn't pass it along if it didn't come from a source who has previously been proven reliable -- is that these scary ravens are croaking something that sounds an awful lot like, "Guy! Guy! Guy! "

Furthermore, congressional staffers tell me they noticed in late July that some of these ravens built a nest in the window of 2233 Rayburn House Office Building, and that when the eggs recently hatched, the baby birds were heard to chirp, "Pete! Pete! Pete!"


  1. Will the Obama dynasty fall if the ravens leave.


  2. Kids today!!!

    Why can't they croak, ''Nevermore' like the rest of us ?

  3. I blame Mencius Moldbug.

  4. Forget about Ravens, we have otters and snakes to worry about:

    Disgusting behavior by Owens, but this will help Hoffman at the next election.

    Bill Ownens' Otter Moment. Except all of us are the insurance company getting scammed on this one.

    And don't feel too bad, that fat Scuzzy-Wuzz-She would have done the same. Blaming a snake for biting you (even a big fat diseased one that smells bad) misses the point, blame the GOP leaders and Newt bringing this snake to the party.