Thursday, March 19, 2009

U.S. spawns record number of bastards

No, we're not talking about Tim Geithner or Chris Dodd, but those 1,714,643 babies born to unmarried women in 2007, according to the National Center for Health Statistics (PDF). Way to go ladies! Just glut the market with free milk so nobody can sell a cow! And congratulations is also due to America's teenage boys and all you other guys who like to shag teenage girls, the New York Times reports:
Also in 2007, for the second straight year and in a trend health officials find worrisome, the rate of births to teenagers rose slightly after declining by one-third from 1991 to 2005.
Score! And of course, we must celebrate diversity:
Racial and ethnic differences remain large: 28 percent of white babies were born to unmarried mothers in 2007, compared with 51 percent of Hispanic babies and 72 percent of black babies. The shares of births to unwed mothers among whites and Hispanics have climbed faster than the share among blacks, but from lower starting points.
More bastards, more knocked-up teenagers -- the future of Weimar America looks bright!


  1. Hey, let's give it up for the bastard generation.
    This makes Bristol Palin look like she's at the forefront of the latest craze!

  2. While I too am concerned about all the 'little bastards', I'm encouraged by the overall birth rate. It's about time we bested the post-war annual record for births.

  3. I agree that single motherhood is not a good thing. But do you have to call the kids bastards? They didn't choose to be born to an irresponsible mother. Save your scorn for the women (and men) who are actually making the decisions.

  4. @Y4E,
    Great to see you back, boss! Rumors of your demise were greatly exaggerated.

  5. A bigger point that is missing here is the fact that the State governments via Uncle Obama are paying for the majority of those babies. How much does that cost us hard working, tax paying citizens. Hell, we don't even get a thank you.

  6. But do you have to call the kids bastards?

    Political correctness strikes again.

       /ˈbæstərd/ Pronunciation [bas-terd]
    1. a person born of unmarried parents; an illegitimate child.