New Jersey man pleased to discover his constitutional right to sex with cows

Better get your brain bleach ready, folks. If you thought McKenzie Phillips doing Papa John -- consensually! -- was the nadir of postmodern American degeneracy, you were wrong. Hat-tip to Dan Collins for finding this guaranteed cookie-hurler for our TMI files:

A New Jersey judge has dismissed animal cruelty charges against a cop accused of committing a sex act with young cows, saying a grand jury had no way of knowing whether the animals were "tormented."
Moorestown police officer Robert Melia, who is currently suspended, allegedly engaged in oral sex acts with five calves in Southampton in 2006.
Since New Jersey currently has no law explicitly banning such an act, prosecutors in Burlington county brought animal cruelty charges against Melia, the Philadelphia Daily News reports.
Judge Morely said it was questionable that Melia's acts, though "disgusting," constituted animal cruelty.
"I'm not saying it's OK," Morely said. "This is a legal question for me. It's not a questions of morals. It's not a question of hygiene. It's not a question of how people should conduct themselves."

But wait! Like a Billy Mays TV informercial, there's more:

The judge's dismissal does not mark the end of Melia's legal woes.
He, along with girlfriend Heather Lewis, was arrested in April 2008 for sexually assaulting three girls over a five-year-period.
Authorities investigating those charges reportedly uncovered videos on his computer of a girl being "subjected to sexual activity" in addition to taped encounters between Melia and the calves.

Sex with kids. Sex with cows. Kiddie porn. Cow porn. Like they say in Delaware, what happens in New Jersey, stays in New Jersey -- and thank God for that. But you're probably asking yourself, "What manner of loathsome creatures could possibly engage in this kind of twisted, decadent evil?"

Somebody tell Don Surber about this . . .

From our TMI files

Remember McKenzie Phillips? "One Day At a Time" star, daughter of Mamas & Papas singer John Phillips? Yeah, Daddy's little darling:

"On the eve of my wedding, my father showed up, determined to stop it," writes Phillips, who was 19 and a heavy drug user at the time. "I had tons of pills, and Dad had tons of everything too. Eventually I passed out on Dad's bed."
"My father was not a man with boundaries. He was full of love, and he was sick with drugs. I woke up that night from a blackout to find myself having sex with my own father."
"Had this happened before? I didn't know. All I can say is it was the first time I was aware of it."
Phillips' life began to spiral out of control. In 1980, she was fired from One Day at a Time because of her constant drug use. That same year, she went to rehab -- with her father. Her sexual relationship with him had become consensual.

"Consensual"? Eeeesshhhh! If you're reading this at breakfast, I apologize for the vomit on your keyboard. To borrow a punchline from Lewis Grizzard, "I don't believe I'd have told that." Or, to quote a fellow blogger, "And you couldn’t go to the grave with this secret?"

Adding insult to injury incest, McKenzie waited to write her tell-too-much book until after her father was dead. Why? Because dead men don't file libel suits.

A 9-year-old transsexual?

From the Department of Whiskey Tango Foxtrot:

A boy of nine has returned to school as a girl in what is believed to be Britain's youngest gender swap.
Children at the school in southern England were told the child had left and been replaced by a female pupil.
The child came dressed in girls' uniform with long hair tied in a pink ribbon.
The case comes after it was revealed yesterday that a 12-year-old boy had started his first term at secondary school in southern England as a girl.
Some parents at the school have criticised staff for not informing them before telling children about the gender change at a special assembly. . . .

Via Blogmocracy. Exactly how soon this child will begin hormone therapy, castration, etc., is unknown, but the mind boggles at the idea. Next on Oprah: "Shemales in Elementary School"!

Remember earlier this year, it was reported that a German boy, Tim Petras, who had begun hormone treatment at age 12 and, at age 16, underwent sex-change surgery to become the world's youngest post-operative transsexual, Kim Petras. We had been warned by Judith Reisman about this trend toward pre-teen transsexuals (???) in January, at which time I responded:

Mister Huxley! Paging Mister Huxley! Mister Aldous Huxley, please pick up the courtesy phone . . .

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised. However, The Apocalypse Will Be Blogged.

CULTURAL APOCALYPSE WATCH:The Pole-Dancer Doll for Girls

God owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology:

It rotates. It has blinking lights, a disco ball, and a pole. And it's probably one of the wrongest toys you can give to any girl.

"Probably"? One hesitates to ask what could possibly be worse. I'm sure the manufacturers will soon be offering a stripper accessory kit -- tramp-stamp tattoo stickers, clip-on belly-button ring, garter with play-money, mint-flavored candy Newports -- but then again, there's always the nipple-tassle T-shirt for girls.

Last year, we had the reality-TV video of Kim Kardashian's pre-teen sisters -- age 9 and 11 -- getting pole-dancing lessons. Earlier this month, there was video of Miley Cyrus's 9-year-old sister Noah pole-dancing -- in black boots and red skirt -- at a pre-party for the Teen Choice Awards.

Today's cultural forecast: Raging epidemics of abuse, perversion, disease and addiction, with a 40% chance of widely scattered fire and brimstone.

UPDATE: Jay at Stop the ACLU:

It is so sad society is going down the toilet and dragging the innocence of our youth along with it.

This story's getting a "Whiskey Tango Foxtrot" reaction on Twitter. Last night I blogged about evidence for the existence of God. And that's about the only hope left.

UPDATE II: Fisherville Mike says, "Glad I have boys." Yeah, Mike, but what if your son brings one of these tramps home? Meanwhile, Cranky Cons says:

Reason #287585783 we’re thinking of raising our children Amish

Oh, and guess what the big question is when Kendra Wilkinson, 24, (Hef's ex-girlfriend, who got married at the Playboy Mansion in June) and Kourtney Kardashian, 30 (celebrity party girl, still unmarried) both discover they're expecting?

Despite having breast implants, both Kendra Wilkinson and Kourtney Kardashian still want to breastfeed, the moms-to-be tell the new issue of Us Weekly . . .

Fake boobs. Real trash.

UPDATE III: Oh, look! Kendra's got a blog:

Hi everyone! Check out my Us Weekly cover and feature with Kourtney Kardashian. Find out all the details about our pregnancies . . . from cravings, to body changes to feelings about our deliveries!!!!!
It was such a fun shoot to do, especially since Kourtney is going through all the same changes as I am. We’re due only two days apart!

What do we call this genre? "Trashosphere"? "Bimbosphere"? At any rate, in addition to the grammatical evidence of mental deficiency -- five, count 'em, five exclamation marks -- Kendra also ends her blog post with a smiley face :D

Oh, Kendra is the one who's actually married, so you can insult her all you want. But not Courtney -- no, she's a single mom and, as Ann Coulter has explained, we are not allowed to criticize the mothers of bastards. And here's a touching story for baby's scrapbook:

"I definitely thought about it long and hard, about if I wanted to keep the baby or not . . . I do think every woman should have the right to do what they want, but I don't think it's talked through enough. I can't even tell you how many people just say, 'Oh, get an abortion.' Like it's not a big deal." Scott Disick, the baby's 26-year-old father, was supportive either way. . . . "He said, 'I really want you to keep it, but I will support you whatever you decide to do.'"

Some advice for Courtney:

1. If you're hanging out with people who casually recommend abortion, you're hanging around bad people.
2. Speaking of bad people, the kind of guy who considers it a coin toss whether you abort his child (a) is a scumbag and (b) doesn't actually love you anyway.

Please see the Koestler quote at the top of the page.

UPDATE IV: Welcome readers of Michelle Malkin, who says:

Thought I’d seen it all.

That's just it. you see. I'm always afraid to say, "It can't get worse than that," because it always does. Because, as you see, "Girls Gone Wild" grow up to be trashy "Moms Gone Wild," and their daughters aspire to follow mom's 4-inch-heeled footsteps down the strip-club runway. (Q. What does a trailer-trash girl get for her 18th birthday? A: Chlamydia!)

In 1998, when Kendra Wilkinson was in eighth grade, parents were being forced to explain the Monica Lewinsky news to their children. And now . . .

Once the Hugh Hefner lifestyle becomes a reality-TV series, and once every no-talent bimbo in the world is trying to get her own reality-TV series . . . well, we're probably just a few years away from Nickelodeon spinning off its own "adult" cable channel featuring the hit series, "The Girls of North Las Vegas Middle School."

UPDATE V: Thanks to commenter Tate for reading far enough into that People magazine interview with Courtney Kardashian to find that the mother-to-be would have been another woman victimized by abortion if she hadn't found some pro-life Web sites:

"I was just sitting there crying, thinking, 'I can’t do that,'" she says. "And I felt in my body, this is meant to be. God does things for a reason, and I just felt like it was the right thing that was happening in my life." (Emphasis added.)

OK, that's enough to soften the heart of McCain The Merciless. And Ms. Kardashian is entirely correct. There are no accidents. And, despite the odds, it's possible that God may even be able to do something with that scumbag boyfriend. (After all, I used to be a Democrat.)

Remember what Jesus said to the women caught in adultery, after he'd saved her life from the accusers who would have stoned her: "Go, and sin no more." Some people, eager to lecture us about not being "judgmental," always seem to forget that last part.