How about a bunny bailout?

Clearly, Congress needs to act now:

Tycoon Hugh Hefner has been advised to cut back on staff at his multi-million dollar glamour empire as it struggles to cope during the global economic turmoil.
The 83-year-old has been told to lay off some of his staff at his Los Angeles and New York offices as soon as this month or go bankrupt. . . .
The news will be another blow to Hefner who recently discovered that two of his "bunnies" may have been cheating on him.

Homeless hotties? Plummeting sales of silicone implants and satin lingerie? A complete meltdown of the global bimbo market? Hef needs to get in touch with Henry Paulson immediately.