Jason Mattera, undercover

Via Hot Air:

Suzanna Logan is in Atlanta working with underprivileged children. Monique Stuart is in Washington, working with overprivileged bureaucrats. Big Sexy is undercover in Virginia, working with overactive socialists. Too bad we never got that Jello wrestling thing happening.

Author: U.S. will take 'a long time' to recover from bailouts and deficit spending

Tuesday night, I attended an America's Future Foundation event featuring Johan Norberg, author of the new book Financial Fiasco: How America's Infatuation with Home Ownership and Easy Money Created the Economic Crisis. I interviewed him for The American Spectator:

Politicians, regulators and central banks in several nations -- including the U.S. Federal Reserve -- helped create the crisis that led to last year's massive Troubled Asset Relief Program (TARP) bailout, Norberg said.
"They distorted all the incentives and inflated the bubble," the Cato Institute senior fellow explained . . .
"I'm afraid we're going to live with the consequences for a long time," he said. "The bailouts . . . the debts -- we won't be able to pay them back. We're going to pay for it for a long time. And it's not just what it costs, it's what we’re buying."
Norberg said the TARP bailout would have the perverse effect of encouraging lenders and other financial institutions to engage in the same kinds of risky behaviors that led to last year’s meltdown.
"If bankers make stupid mistakes and we bail them out, it encourages them to take big risks in order to make short-term gains, knowing that if they lose out, they can always send the bill to the taxpayers," Norberg said. . . .

You can read the whole thing. Norberg spoke yesterday at a book forum at Cato (video at the link) and you can buy Norberg's book:

'Ask not what your president can do for you. Ask what you can do . . .'

". . . for your president," says Ace of Spades, translating the teacher's guide to President Obama's Sept. 8 speech to students. Ace is demanding to see an advance text of the speech:

I'm not saying I don't trust you. I'm just saying -- no, I am saying I don't trust you, now that I think about it.

More at Memeorandum, Exurban League, 24Ahead, The Daily Paul, Michelle Malkin, Moe Lane, Hot Air, Dr. Melissa Clouthier, And So It Goes In Shreveport, Pundit & Pundette and Caught Him With a Corndog.

UPDATE: Michelle Malkin follows up with a column:

Obama's White House Teaching Fellows include Chicago high school educator Xian Barrett, a fierce opponent of charter schools who founded a "Social Justice Club" and bussed students to protests and Michelle Bissonette, a Los Altos, Calif., teacher who is "focused on developing my leadership as a more culturally and racially conscious educator."
The activist tradition of government schools using students as junior lobbyists cannot be ignored. . . .

Read the whole thing and, please, parents, ask yourself: "Why am I entrusting my child's education to unionized government bureaucrats?"

UPDATE II: An excellent suggestion from that role model for America's youth, VodkaPundit:

In impossible times, the only way to be a responsible parent is to do the irresponsible thing. If my son were in a public school…
I’d call him in sick next Tuesday. I’d keep him home. I suggest you do so. I urge you to do so. If pressed, be honest about your reasons -- but be reasonable about presenting them. Otherwise, don’t offer an explanation. Make it a silent protest.

VodkaPundit's a dad now, and I'm sure this will be a teachable moment at his house: "OK, son, today we're going to learn how to make Daddy a martini . . ."

Pat in Shreveport on 9/11

by Smitty

Pat does an excellent job of reviewing 9/11, paying close attention to the Community Organizer in Chief's attempt to redefine how Americans think about it. As with the 08Sep address to schoolkids, this would be odd on its own, but takes on a negative spin in the context of the administration's track record.

Pat didn't mention, or if she did I missed it, Project 2,996. I guess this isn't new, but it's the first year I've heard of it.

As I personally knew LCDR Robert Randolph Elseth, I'll be paying homage to an excellent American, steadfastly refusing to submit to the whims of a propaganda machine.

Cheney is not a 2012 hopeful

by Smitty

Allahpundit's trademark exit question:

You guys wouldn’t seriously consider him in a three-way race with Romney and Huckabee. Would you?

Not just no, but ObamaCare no. Guy's got a lousy ticker. The George Washington University has been in his heart so many times, they put a zipper on his sternum. Not really. But he's medically removed from consideration.

On the cutting of slack

by Smitty

There is an excellent point raised by a commenter concerning the repeated plunging into the suject of Chappaquiddick.

There is nobody left who really knows exactly what happened that night 40 years ago.

One would think that given the inherent ambiguity in that night's events that commentators could cut Kennedy some slack - particularly in death.

Ah, can't we just forget all of this, in the midst of the moral ambiguity?

No no no no no, a thousand repetitions of no, and again: get stuffed.

Here are the two points I raised last Saturday on the FMJRA post [thanks, Dandapani], with some more elaboration:

• We flatter ourselves as having a justice system that treats citizens equally. I should point out that IANAL, and the following represents a common-sense take on the legal system, as opposed to what one frequently encounters.
  
  • If you're a terrorist thug who's sought American lives currently in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, you are getting more respectful treatment from the American legal system (military or civil) than Mary Jo. Explain the tolerability of this.
  • You can make the argument that the court of public opinion in Massachusetts obviously acquitted the subject, as they kept returning the individual to the Senate for decades. Yet, a Senator's scope exceeds that of his state. I'd be more inclined to say, "Aw, those goofy Mass-hats" if there was not substantial evidence of Soviet collaboration. So not only do we have someone demonstrating a two-tier justice system apparently because of their last name, but that person goes on to engage in what appears to be fishy activity. What else do we not know, and how much better off would we be absent this purportedly illustrious Senate career?
  • Finally, we have a disgusting thought balloon that maybe Mary Jo would have approved of the whole turn of events. I suppose such a hyper-utilitarian-cum-suicidal thought process is theoretically possible. But one wonders if Melissa Lafsky understands that her argument could be seen as an approval of capital punishment. Mary Jo certainly stands convicted of no crime. Yet the thought seems to be that the possibly improved societal outcome of an arguably useful political career, in some way, justifies Mary Jo's death. Those of you on the left: substitute a picture of Mary Jo on the face of someone facing capital punishment next time the cable news networks are in death porn mode, and give me your best shot of righteous indignation about the horror of the death penalty.
• Having flogged the multi-tier legal system a bit, let us turn to this concept of Camel Snot. Screw your horrible, un-American, elitist, intellectually untenable propaganda. To the wall. With a big drill press. Politico calls the vacant seat a "once-in-a-generation opening". A what? Does this mean that generations are a six-year occurrence in Massachusetts? Either:
  • The subject clan is really a superior source of leadership *snort*,
  • The people of Massachusetts are significantly challenged in ways I can't explore without becoming insulting,
  • Or someone is working the poles, IYKWIM

This Camel Snot myth, and the concept of a permanent political class, while certainly a reasonable First Amendment expression, deserves to be thoroughly mocked at all times and in all places by all who consider themselves defenders of the Constitution. For Camel Snot is the antithesis of the Constitution.

Arguably, in ways no one short of the Almighty can calculate, the subject may have atoned for Chappaquiddick. Yes, we should not fall short of admitting that our topic did good things and took care of his state during his career. At the same time, let us not expect the propaganda machine to consider matters of justice or egalitarianism, and do the work of balancing the dialogue for them.

There, see: I talked about injustice and the egalitarian roots of this country, and never mentioned the deceased by name as much as a single time.

'What Is the President Trying to Tell Me?'

Why is he gesturing with his middle finger extended?

How have things reached such a state of political crisis that Michelle Malkin is linking Ron Paul?

Why have my Mommy and Daddy started talking about home-schooling me this year?

UPDATE: Now a Memorandum thread, with a slew of conservative bloggers commenting about the president's Sept. 8 speech to school children: Hot Air, Dr. Melissa Clouthier, And So It Goes In Shreveport, Pundit & Pundette and Caught Him With a Corndog.

NRSC's John Cornyn Keeps Fumbling Away GOP's Senate Chances for 2010

The halfwit senator from Texas, whose wrong-headed interference in the Florida primary sparked the Not One Red Cent rebellion against the National Republican Senatorial Committee, has continued his campaign to destroy what little hope remains of the Republican Party's hope for gaining Senate seats in the 2010 mid-term election. John Hawkins of Right Wing News reports:

After [the Charlie Crist] endorsement, the NRSC continued meddling in primaries, but they've done it more subtly. In California, I've been told that Cornyn has told private donor gatherings that Carly Fiorina is the NRSC's choice. Why keep it below the radar like that? To try to cut off funds to Chuck Devore without catching the attention of blogs like this one.
The NRSC is also infuriating Republicans in Colorado with these same kind of the behind the scenes moves . . .
"The chairman of the Colorado Republican Party says he plans to inform a national GOP group today that it created a 'backlash' by registering two domain names for potential U.S. Senate candidate Jane Norton." . . . .
How dare these arrogant jackasses at the NRSC disrespect Republicans across the country be interfering in these primaries? I know what they're thinking, "2010 is going to be a good year. We'll win some seats no matter what and then everyone will agree that we were smart to interfere." . . .

Please read John Hawkins' entire column and send a message to John Cornyn and those treacherous sellout swine at the NRSC:

NOT ONE RED CENT!

URGENT: Dateline -- Martha's Vineyard

Our correspondent Mr. Wrestling IV at Big Hollywood:

Let me get this straight, Joyce [Carol Oates]: Mary Jo Kopechne's life was not as important as Sen. Kennedy's subsequent career? And furthermore, Melissa [Lafsky], correct me if I am misunderstanding you here, but Mary Jo might have felt that her life was worth forfeiting so that Teddy could go on to co-author an education bill, or to destroy the career of Robert Bork, or to protect the rights of women to abort unwanted fetuses?
I seem to remember a certain female reporter remarking, after the Clinton/Lewinsky scandal broke, that she would be willing to perform a "Lewinsky" on Pres. Clinton simply because of his stand on abortion rights. But I suspect that, even for her, suffocating in a submerged car for four or five hours might just be a Martha’s Vineyard bridge too far. . . .

Total body slam! Read the whole brutal thing.

By the way, this is probably a good time to express my appreciation to those readers -- including generous folks in Albuquerque, N.M., Jacksonville, Fla., Depauville, N.Y., and Tequesta, Fla. -- who have recently done their share to help me push the frontiers of rhetorical brutality against idiot liberals and RINO sellouts.

Many readers, who see these demented swine and want to do their part to crush them like ants, have asked me, "Gee, Stacy, what can we do?" And I always encourage them give generously to The McCain-Kennedy Kopechne Memorial Health Care Fund.

(ENTIRELY UNNECESSARY LEGAL DISCLAIMER: The McCain-Kennedy Kopechne Memorial Health Care Fund is neither non-profit, charitable nor tax-exempt. So far as anyone can determine, all proceeds go to help pay the bills of Robert Stacy McCain, his wife and six children who, as luck would have it, are among the umpteen kazillion uninsured Americans that liberals keep whining about. However, because Mr. McCain's children are neither illegal immigrants nor Democrats, liberals don't give a damn about them. Any resemblance between The McCain-Kennedy Kopechne Memorial Health Care Fund and a so-called "tip jar" PayPal account is probably coincidental. IYKWIMAITYD. Contributions to The McCain-Kennedy Kopechne Memorial Health Care Fund are not tax deductible, although it's possible you might get a little kickback by way of a free beer if you should ever catch me in a bar with cash in my pocket. And good luck with that. GIVE NOW -- it's for the children!)

The Fatwah and the Furious: Riyadh Drift

Eternal gratitude to Founding Bloggers for this one: Saudi kids have discovered the joys of "drifting" and getting into hilarious wrecks in the process:

Talk about your triumph of Western imperialism! Once the youth of the Islamic world discover the joys of hot-rodding, it's only a matter of time before they're chilling with some 40s, cranking up the subwoofers and telling the radical clerics, "Jihad? Dude, that's like so 2001."

What next? Mud-bogging in Yemen? Motocross in Damascus? Jet-skis in the Persian Gulf? Right now, there's probably some Iranian teenagers risking the wrath of the mullahs by skating a half-pipe in the suburbs of Tehran and sharing bootleg Tony Hawk videos with their homies.

Again, thanks to our friends at Founding Bloggers.

Your C-130 Awaits, Mr. Will: Let The Jalalabad Intellectual Airdrop Begin!

Remember my strategic plan to deploy him?

"The Air Force should load George Will and David Brooks into a C-130 and airdrop them, sans parachute, on a Taliban position in Afghanistan. They're useless as intellectuals, but perhaps they'll do some good as ordnance."
-- Robert Stacy McCain, Nov. 10, 2008

And I said it again, on Nov. 16: Airdrop him on Jalalabad. But did the geniuses who run the conservative movement listen to me? No.

So now we have Will joining the cut-and-run brigade, urging us to abandon the one war that even Nancy Pelosi agrees was worth fighting. And everybody's suddenly shocked -- shocked! -- to discover Will's intellectual uselessness. The esteemed Jules Crittenden:

This George Will column, “Why Are We Still In Afghanistan” . . . can be summed up quickly: War’s hard. Vietnam was hard, and also impossible, Afghanistan’s harder and more impossible. Abandon now. Cruise missile counterterrorism policy, please.

Such eminent conservative intellectuals as Rich Lowry, Peter Wehner and Fred Kagan -- at least two of whom I'm eyeing as candidates to become our Nagasaki weapon if the George Freaking Will Hiroshima Bomb doesn't terrify the Taliban into unconditional surrender -- also claim to have discovered the intellectual unsoundness of GFW. And speaking of top-drawer pointy-heads, here's my good buddy Bill Kristol:

Will is not calling on the United States to accept a moderate degree of success in Afghanistan, and simply to stop short of some overly ambitious goal. Will is urging retreat, and accepting defeat.

Well said, Mr. Kristol! As I told you the first time we met, that afternoon in front of AEI's offices, my wife has always liked you. It's that smile.

"He just seems like such a nice man," Mrs. Other McCain says. And the fact you never joined the anti-Palin crowd is a big point in your favor, which is why -- despite your failure to anticipate the catastrophic disaster of the Maverick candidacy -- I have never proposed loading you onto a C-130 bound for the front lines outside Kandahar.

Our elite conservative intellectuals are a precious strategic resource and they must be deployed judiciously. If we squander our advantage -- how many GOP pundits does the Taliban have, huh? -- by airdropping these commentators willy-nilly in so-called "pinpoint strikes," the shock-and-awe impact will be wasted.

So first George Freaking Will and then David Brooks, just to let the enemy know we mean business, and then . . .

Well, I'm not going to outline my entire strategic plan here on the Internet, where Taliban intelligence operatives might read it. But you can't win a war through air power alone, and trust me, I've got the entire combined-operations strategy mapped out. I probably won't be tipping our hand too much merely by mentioning the part that involves a remote-control C4 explosive belt, a burqa and Maureen Dowd but . . .

We have not yet begun to fight!

Remind me again which country this is

by Smitty (h/t Drudge)

The Kansas City Star reports on Federal agents cracking down on garage sales.

The initiative, which targets toys and other products for children, enforces a new provision that makes it a crime to resell anything that's been recalled by its manufacturer.

"Those who resell recalled children's products are not only breaking the law, they are putting children's lives at risk," said Inez Tenenbaum, the recently confirmed chairwoman of the Consumer Product Safety Commission.

The overall decay of our legal system is not new to Eric "Nation of Cowards" Holder. Heritage has an article detailing the decay of the legal aspect of our three-tier system of government. All your local police stations will be staffed by the law-enforcement equivalent of David Brooks, as those pesky James Crowley types are replaced by more "nuanced" people.

"Granny, I'm afraid I need you to give me that doll, but mostly I'm just afraid".

It's the tragic law enforcement equivalent of this silly, yet perhaps prescient, Onion editorial. Which direction is the country headed? As this pack of mostly lawyer dolts who've never run any business of consequence continue to turn out federal laws by the ream, where are the Governors saying: "This is baked, we're not enforcing it. Why doesn't Congress do something reasonable with its output and man the shredder?"

Of course, we've seen where the previous Governor of Kansas went. It certainly wasn't Africa, Toto, much to our detriment.

My fellow Americans, in this seemingly asinine story, there is a deep warning that we badly need to re-think everything going on politically in the US. This brick in the "won't somebody think about the children" story is in the "Nutrition is not a private matter" vein. We absolutely do not need the Federal government monitoring our yard sales. We do need to be building the pressure on our state legislatures to stage an Article V cram-down to tell the Federal government (i.e. our permanent political class) to lay by its dish.

Or else acquire a taste for the leash. 100% natural, free range, fair trade leather bull whip, of course.

Open Season on David Brooks

One post is never enough, is it? When you take up the habit of bashing David Brooks, it's like crack cocaine. One hit and you're hooked.

Michelle Malkin calls Brooks an "emetic," although I'm thinking he's actually a disorder affecting the other end of the alimentary canal. Honestly, what can you say about this kind of sloshy, malordorous, dysenteric discharge?

Brooks seems relieved to have an intellectual in the White House again. "I divide people into people who talk like us and who don't talk like us," he explains. "Of recent presidents, Clinton could sort of talk like us, but Obama is definitely -- you could see him as a New Republic writer. He can do the jurisprudence, he can do the political philosophy, and he can do the politics. I think he's more talented than anyone in my lifetime. . . ."

By "people who talk like us," Brooks means: Neurasthenic wimps who spent most of their school career getting beaten up on the playground.

I've heard Obama speak and I've heard Brooks speak and, except that they both speak English, they have nothing in common in that regard.

Brooks speaks for the testosterone-deficient, the effete, those who are by habit critics because they lack the capacity to actually do anything. To borrow Patton's description of such creatures, they know even less about fighting than they know about fornication, which is nothing at all.

And the funny thing is, Brooks cannot begin to imagine the contempt with which he is actually regarded by Obama, or the vicious ridicule which Obama's henchmen direct at him behind his back. You've got to know Rahm Emanuel's just busting a gut laughing at the ridiculous Brooks right now.

So the New Republic sends over a reporter to interview Brooks and it never even occurs to Brooks that he might embarrass himself by gushing so girlishly about Obama's pants-creases. It's this utter shamelessness that astonishes Craig Henry:

I was wrong.
I was certain that David Brooks could never equal the performance he turned in during the 2008 campaign. Flush with Obama-love he lost all restraint. Brooks put his arrogant knowingness, his ignorant fatuity, and his whining neediness on display for all the world to see.Even besotted old fools eventually regain their senses and cringe when they look back on what they said and did.
But not our Mr. Brooks. His passion has not run its course and he remains willing to be Barak’s clown. He will even brag about it to interviewers . . .

Paco is more merciful:

Yeah, I know, it’s like shooting a crippled bream in an aquarium, but the fishy Mr. Brooks keeps inviting ridicule . . .

Yet even Allahpundit recoils before the unmitigated Brooks:

As much as I hate the fetishization of populism, it’d be hard to find a more loathsome expression of intellectual elitism . . .

One more thing, however, I feel obligated to call to your attention:

“David is a conservative who is motivated by a deep distrust of ideology,” former Bush speechwriter Michael Gerson, a Brooks friend, says. “That is a strain of conservatism. . . ."

Yes, it is a "strain," the sort of strain one feels when one has eaten too much cheese, but to attempt an analysis of constipationism would be to digress. Rather, what I wish to call to your attention is that Gerson and Brooks are described as "friends" when, in fact, they are peas in a pod.

Honestly, have you ever seen two faces so smugly similar? Merely look at them, and you comprehend at a glance that there are certain schools of political thought which are united not by any particular philosophical principle, but by the common experience of having been called "four-eyes" (and worse) as a child.

Their ideology might as well be called Mother-Wouldn't-Let-Me-Play-Footballism. It fails to persuade because there is nothing sturdy and red-blooded about it. It is not an idea that stands on its hind legs. Theirs is a "conservatism" that squats to pee.

We are not surprised to learn that one of Brooks' friends is Gerson, author of The Sentence That Shall Live In Infamy: "Herewith, a brief primer." Of course, a second-rate man would deserve such a third-rate admirer.

However much I disagree politically with our Kenyan Marxist progressive president, I'll grant him this: He smokes Marlboro Reds.

You've got to reserve some measure of respect for the daredevil who risks death by firing up a Marlboro Red -- a real tough-guy smoke. Marines and truck drivers and Nick Nolte smoke Marlboro Reds.

Take a look at Gerson and Brooks and try to picture them puffing Marlboro Reds. You can't. They don't have it in them. It would irritate their allergies.

Real men don't have allergies or, at least, none they will admit except when filling out a hospital admission form. But neurasthenics cherish their allergies the way Brooks cherishes a well-creased pants leg. Obama has nothing in common with such geldings. Obama smokes Marlboro Reds.

So when Brooks looks at Obama and claims to see a New Republic writer, what he is actually praising is his own Walter Mitty fantasy of himself, imagining that he, David Brooks, were a tough daredevil kind of guy, cool enough to smoke Marlboro Reds.

He's not. And never will be. And it eats him alive.

Chelsea Marriage on Chappaquiddick?

by Smitty

HillBuzz links a New York Post piece about the possible nuptials between Marc Mezvinsky and Chelsea Clinton.

This blog would like to be among the first to wish them happiness wherever they enjoy the sacrament of marriage, and also to eschew committing to the cloudy-webs at least a dozen cheap, unsavory and wholly unnecessary japes that come to mind.

But let me pass on a helpful bit of German to Marc:
"Es liegt mir fern meiner Schwiegermutter zu widersprechen."
"Far be it from me to contradict my mother-in-law."

Repetition of this phrase, and shameless obedience to the ramifications of its meaning, have been key to my calm relations in the Old Country. Particularly after I cooked pancakes, and they brought out Weißwurst, and I showed them pigs in a blanket. Never do this in Germany. They don't roll like that.

Flog me gently with a morning star

by Smitty

Last Saturday I was at an American Legion post in Woodbridge, VA, with Bob McDonnell.

I was favorably disposed. He was speaking to an audience of veterans, and he sounded like a politician talking to veterans. The only real ovation came at the end of the speech where he promised to do his best to get the Federal government to respect the 10th Amendment.

So here is news, via Virginia Virtucon, that the left is trying to make a campaign issue out of McDonnell's 1989 thesis. This, when all of the school records of the good president are mysteriously mysterious mystery (for which inane writing Stacy may shoot me).

Why do any readers care fig #1 about the VA gubernatorial race? This and the NJ race are crucial to keeping the momentum alive going into the 2010 campaign season. Too, McDonnell is himself a veteran and may help build consensus at the State level to push through some of the badly needed reforms to combat:

• The permanent political class. Read: aristocracy
• 95% devaluation of the dollar since the Federal Reserve was created to "stabilize the value of the dollar".
• Malignant entitlement tumor growth.

No pressure, McDonnell.

Any one of those three bullet points should be causing Americans to freak out. And yet the media has chosen to focus on a 1988 thesis. Is there an overtly perverse joy in the Alinsky Rule #5 exercise of sticking it to the conservative when they were too incurious to make BHO's academic work an issue, on wonders?

Flog me gently, at a medium pace.

Rosemary Port is insecure and vindictive

You remember Rosemary Port, the saggy-breasted blogger whose "Skanks in NYC" was devoted entirely to trashing model Liskula Cohen?

On CNBC just now, the host held up the New York Post story that explains that the "sole purpose" of Port's blog was to "blast" Cohen "because the blogger believed Cohen had badmouthed her to her boyfriend"!

Port is "an unemployed 29-year-old Florida native," the Post story explains:

Sources close to Port said she had gotten along with Cohen, whom she had met at events around town over the past few years. Port became hurt and angry when she was told the model had been talking smack about her to the blogger's on-again, off-again boyfriend, Daniel Dimin.
Cohen allegedly told Dimin that Port was hanging out with an unsavory crowd, a source said.
Soon afterward, in August 2008, Port took to her computer and set up "Skanks in NYC," posting unflattering pictures of Cohen and writing that she was "a psychotic, lying, whoring . . . skank."

See? The problem with anonymous attack-blogging is that the target is public while the anonymity of the attacker may conceal a hidden, personal motive. The attack-blogger dishes out the ad hominem, while exempting themselves from similar attacks by being a non-person. (I actually had to explain this to an anti-Palin troll who idiotically accused me of defaming his pseudonym.)

As often as I have attacked people on this blog -- and I'm not through with you yet, David Brooks! -- I've never believed in that kind of backstabbing poison-pen stuff.

Think about it. All Rosemary Port would have had to do wass to confront Liskula Cohen directly: "Hey, I heard you said such-and-so to Daniel, and I don't appreciate it." Of course, if Port's accusation was true -- if Cohen had actually done what Port suspected she'd done -- then Cohen committed the first wrong.

But if you believe somebody's done you wrong, you deal with it head-on. An anonymous campaign of slander is not the solution. Just take it directly to the person involved (if they are someone you know personally) or if not, air your grievance in public -- and put your name on it. (Clark Stooksbury and I have been going at it forever this way.)

Consider, for example, my campaign to get Rich Lowry fired as editor of National Review. I'd sort of watched the NR operation from a distance over the years, and was aware of their maltreatment of various conservative writers whom I knew. I was also aware that that NR kept making stupid decisions -- including the publication of David Frum's "Unpatriotic Conservatives" cover, to say nothing of lending their support to Rod Dreher's erroneous "Crunchy Cons" doctrine. (Have Frum and Dreher ever attacked each other? Perhaps I should stir up a fight between them, just for the heck of it.)

Anyway, I watched NR's blundering until I finally had as much as I could stand. In May 2008, out of a clear blue sky, "The Editors" of National Review took a cheap shot at Bob Barr, whom they'd been doing their best to ignore until it appeared that Barr might actually win the Libertarian Party nomination.

So "The Editors" were now on my radar, and I gave Lowry another shot on June 23, which caused a fellow journalist to e-mail me:

WTF? Tertiary syphilis??? Unless you have information I doubt you have, this would probably be actionable if Rich Lowry read it.

Ah, so a clarification was in order. A few weeks later, however, I noted Lowry man-crushing on Obama. NTTAWWT.

You see that for years I had been aware of problems at National Review, yet only last year did I begin to figure out that the fish was rotting from the head downward. So I fired a couple a shots that I'm sure Lowry didn't even notice coming from a pissant nobody like me. Ah, but "tertiary syphilis" was a good one, wasn't it?

Well, this month, Lowry made a couple of mistakes that hurt: (a) he published some columns stirring up the "Birther" meme, and (b) he accused Sarah Palin and her supporters of "hysteria" over the ObamaCare "death panels." And when I (now a somewhat less obscure pissant nobody) described this as "evidence for the prosecution in the continuing case of Why Rich Lowry Should Have Been Fired No Later Than 2001," some people more important than me were nodding their heads in agreement. The impression that Lowry's stayed to long at the dance is now solidifying.

However, I was never secretive about any of this. There was no whisper campaign and I've got no hidden agenda. Friends of mine have written for NR, and though I'd once entertained an idea or two in that direction, I dropped it after hearing my friends complain bitterly about the difficulty of getting paid for their freelance contributions.

So I could be accused of no personal motive for going after Lowry. He's never done anything to me personally, and NR's indifference to paying freelancers promptly meant that I'd cast off any notion of writing for them. This gave me the enormous latitude of action enjoyed by a man with nothing to lose and no stake in the game -- as might be suggested by that "tertiary syphilis" remark.

Such bluntness is quite unusual among conservatives in Washington, where custom dictates that you must smile in the faces of their worst enemies within the movement. In Washington, if you want to undercut somebody, you backstab them, badmouth them in whispered conversations or (most common tactic of all) favor them only with qualified praise, "Well, he's good, don't get me wrong, but . . ."

This explains my extreme hostility toward the anonymous attack-blogger, saggy-breasted Rosemary Port, who is merely adapting to the Internet the kind of methods by which Washington backstabbers have always operated. People will harbor some private grievance or suspicion or dislike for someone else and, rather than to be up-front and honest about it, will carry on a private guerrilla vengeance campaign, badmouthing the target of their hate.

That backstabbing stuff is dishonorable and, when carried to such extremes as Rosemary -- or Jesse Griffin or "Audrey" -- betrays an unworthy malevolence. This is why the anonymous attack-blogger is anonymous, you see. They are aware they're doing evil and that, if their names were known, their motives would be questioned.

Anyway, so I'd seen this "back story" to the Port-Cohen fight, and had these thoughts. Just as I have no actual evidence that Rosemary Port has breasts that hang down like a beagle's ears, so do I lack proof that Rich Lowry's brain is steadily being reduced to gelatinous mush by tertiary syphilis. On the other hand . . .

Well, we'll leave it at that. To engage in hypothetical speculation about these things would be dishonorable.

George Soros vs. The Best. Book. Evah!

The Boss:

"At HuffPo, a Soros-tied co-author has launched a bid to dislodge conservative authors — and he's asking for help from every last nutroots activist out there. . . .
"Co-author Michael Huttner urges his fellow Obama cultists to buy the book [50 Ways You Can Help Obama Change America] . . .
"[W]e also hope it contributes to changing the dialogue in this country, at a time when it's beginning to look a little too much like the Bush era with books by right-wingers Michelle Malkin, Glenn Beck and [some douchebag who isn't actually conservative] topping this week's national bestsellers list."

You must fight back! You must buy the No. 1 New York Times bestseller: Culture of Corruption: Obama And His Team of Tax Cheats, Crooks, and Cronies -- actually, you should buy two copies and give one to a liberal friend, just to annoy him.

It's the Best. Book. Evah!

Occupation: Reality-TV Scumbag

Somebody convene a seance and ask Andy Warhol's ghost how he feels about this.

See, I'm working on a long essay that's sort of a follow-up to the previous pre-teen pole-dancer doll story -- evidently, girls have to start practicing earlier and earlier these days for their debut in Girls Gone Wild: Spring Break in Daytona -- and a question arose:

"What does Kourtney Kardashian's 26-year-old boyfriend Scott Disick do for a living?"

Ah, silly old-fashioned me . . . not what, but who. Which is to say, Disick is apparently a semi-pro gigolo:

"I'm not a rent-boy, but I play one on TV."

He is an untalented actor who seems to have made it through the cattle-call audition for the coveted role of "Reality TV Celebutante's Scumbag Boyfriend."

Soon to be appearing in a new role, "Reality TV Celebutante's Estranged Scumbag Baby-Daddy."

The genre of reality-TV being relatively new, who knows to what heights of untalented fame Scott Disick may yet rise? It's easy to imagine his IMDB filmography going forward:

• 2011-12: Alienating the Kardashians (E!, 23 episodes)-- "Scumbag Baby-Daddy Getting One Last Chance With Reality TV Celebutante and Finally Getting Caught With the 19-Year Old Babysitter."
• 2012: Suing the Kardashians (MTV, 6 episodes) -- "Scumbag Baby-Daddy Demanding 50 Percent of Realty-TV Royalties Paid to Illegitimate Son."
• 2013: Counter-Sued by the Kardashians (TruTV, 4 episodes) -- "Scumbag Baby-Daddy Rather Rudely Reminded of 'Moral Turpitude' Clause in Original Contract."
• 2014: Stalking the Kardashians (Spike, 9 episodes) -- "Has-Been Scumbag Repeatedly Violating Restraining Order."
• 2015-16: Doing My Cellmate's Laundry (TruTV, 21 episodes) -- "Imprisoned Scumbag Pimped Out for a Carton of Newports."
• 2017-18: Out On the Streets of the Castro (Bravo, 15 episodes) -- "Gay Ex-Convict Beginning New Career as San Francisco Sex Worker."
• 2019: The Beard (Lifetime, 11 episodes) -- "Former Castro Sex Worker Pretending to Be Kathy Griffin's Scumbag Boyfriend."

Et cetera. Potentially a lucrative career. No wonder Levi Johnston is chasing his "Ricky Hollywood" dream.

We Get the World's Best Commenters

"This guy just hasn't jumped the shark, he's jumped it, pried open its cloaca, and climbed inside."
-- "Anonymous," commenting on David Brooks

And you see where the brilliance lies: cloaca.

If anyone can cite an occasion when that word has been used with more brutal effect, I'd like to see it. What amazes me is that a writer capable of such first-class invective should be willing to post it as an anonymous blog commenter. A tip of the hat, sir!

Wait a minute . . . that style seems familiar. Did I just get an anonymous comment from Dennis Miller?

Not an Onion satire

Gabriel Sherman's article describing how David Brooks got his man-crush on Obama seems to have been pulled off the New Republic Web site, but you can still read it in Google cache:

"I don't want to sound like I'm bragging," Brooks recently told me, "but usually when I talk to senators, while they may know a policy area better than me, they generally don't know political philosophy better than me. I got the sense he knew both better than me."
That first encounter is still vivid in Brooks's mind. "I remember distinctly an image of--we were sitting on his couches, and I was looking at his pant leg and his perfectly creased pant," Brooks says, “and I'm thinking, a) he's going to be president and b) he'll be a very good president." In the fall of 2006, two days after Obama's The Audacity of Hope hit bookstores, Brooks published a glowing Times column. The headline was "Run, Barack, Run."

Vomit, reader, vomit. And be sure to give generously to the David Brooks Fisking Fund. Commenters should feel free to describe in their own words exactly what's wrong with the Perfect Pants-Crease Theory of statesmanship. I'll try to come back and take a stab at it myself later. Right now, though, I feel the need to take a shower . . . Ick. Shudder.

(Via Memeorandum.)

UPDATE: OK, inspired by one of the commenters ("Wipe your chin, Mr. Brooks"), I now have a two-word description of the Brooks-Obama relationship: Pearl necklace.

But readers fluent in Japanese could probably describe it in one word.

As long as Franz Ferdinand steers clear of the Balkans, we're OK

by Smitty

A great new band merits a post. They're listed as "alternative", because they're all over the map from simple pop, to danceable, to electronic, to thrashy. That's because they reek of raw talent, good artistic chemistry, and fun. Here is a sampling:

No You Girls, unplugged in the stairwell.

The release version forbids embedding, but has a decidedly danceable groove.

On Conan O'Brien, they do You're What She Came For which is a straightforward pop track until about the last minute when they go for some straight-ahead thrash.

Lucid Dreams is a more danceable piece, but they go for about four minutes of a synthesizer exploration that really works. Normally, electronica doesn't do much for me. Like thrash, that kind of noodling often seems an apology for other artistic shortcomings. But they've bought enough respect elsewhere to make this a nice palate cleanser.

Live, their sound's a trifle less polished, to good effect. Here they cover Blondie Call Me w/Elly (?) and their sound has just a hint of Sabbath, with foppish costuming via Bowie:

CULTURAL APOCALYPSE WATCH:The Pole-Dancer Doll for Girls

God owes Sodom and Gomorrah an apology:

It rotates. It has blinking lights, a disco ball, and a pole. And it's probably one of the wrongest toys you can give to any girl.

"Probably"? One hesitates to ask what could possibly be worse. I'm sure the manufacturers will soon be offering a stripper accessory kit -- tramp-stamp tattoo stickers, clip-on belly-button ring, garter with play-money, mint-flavored candy Newports -- but then again, there's always the nipple-tassle T-shirt for girls.

Last year, we had the reality-TV video of Kim Kardashian's pre-teen sisters -- age 9 and 11 -- getting pole-dancing lessons. Earlier this month, there was video of Miley Cyrus's 9-year-old sister Noah pole-dancing -- in black boots and red skirt -- at a pre-party for the Teen Choice Awards.

Today's cultural forecast: Raging epidemics of abuse, perversion, disease and addiction, with a 40% chance of widely scattered fire and brimstone.

UPDATE: Jay at Stop the ACLU:

It is so sad society is going down the toilet and dragging the innocence of our youth along with it.

This story's getting a "Whiskey Tango Foxtrot" reaction on Twitter. Last night I blogged about evidence for the existence of God. And that's about the only hope left.

UPDATE II: Fisherville Mike says, "Glad I have boys." Yeah, Mike, but what if your son brings one of these tramps home? Meanwhile, Cranky Cons says:

Reason #287585783 we’re thinking of raising our children Amish

Oh, and guess what the big question is when Kendra Wilkinson, 24, (Hef's ex-girlfriend, who got married at the Playboy Mansion in June) and Kourtney Kardashian, 30 (celebrity party girl, still unmarried) both discover they're expecting?

Despite having breast implants, both Kendra Wilkinson and Kourtney Kardashian still want to breastfeed, the moms-to-be tell the new issue of Us Weekly . . .

Fake boobs. Real trash.

UPDATE III: Oh, look! Kendra's got a blog:

Hi everyone! Check out my Us Weekly cover and feature with Kourtney Kardashian. Find out all the details about our pregnancies . . . from cravings, to body changes to feelings about our deliveries!!!!!
It was such a fun shoot to do, especially since Kourtney is going through all the same changes as I am. We’re due only two days apart!

What do we call this genre? "Trashosphere"? "Bimbosphere"? At any rate, in addition to the grammatical evidence of mental deficiency -- five, count 'em, five exclamation marks -- Kendra also ends her blog post with a smiley face :D

Oh, Kendra is the one who's actually married, so you can insult her all you want. But not Courtney -- no, she's a single mom and, as Ann Coulter has explained, we are not allowed to criticize the mothers of bastards. And here's a touching story for baby's scrapbook:

"I definitely thought about it long and hard, about if I wanted to keep the baby or not . . . I do think every woman should have the right to do what they want, but I don't think it's talked through enough. I can't even tell you how many people just say, 'Oh, get an abortion.' Like it's not a big deal." Scott Disick, the baby's 26-year-old father, was supportive either way. . . . "He said, 'I really want you to keep it, but I will support you whatever you decide to do.'"

Some advice for Courtney:

1. If you're hanging out with people who casually recommend abortion, you're hanging around bad people.
2. Speaking of bad people, the kind of guy who considers it a coin toss whether you abort his child (a) is a scumbag and (b) doesn't actually love you anyway.

Please see the Koestler quote at the top of the page.

UPDATE IV: Welcome readers of Michelle Malkin, who says:

Thought I’d seen it all.

That's just it. you see. I'm always afraid to say, "It can't get worse than that," because it always does. Because, as you see, "Girls Gone Wild" grow up to be trashy "Moms Gone Wild," and their daughters aspire to follow mom's 4-inch-heeled footsteps down the strip-club runway. (Q. What does a trailer-trash girl get for her 18th birthday? A: Chlamydia!)

In 1998, when Kendra Wilkinson was in eighth grade, parents were being forced to explain the Monica Lewinsky news to their children. And now . . .

Once the Hugh Hefner lifestyle becomes a reality-TV series, and once every no-talent bimbo in the world is trying to get her own reality-TV series . . . well, we're probably just a few years away from Nickelodeon spinning off its own "adult" cable channel featuring the hit series, "The Girls of North Las Vegas Middle School."

UPDATE V: Thanks to commenter Tate for reading far enough into that People magazine interview with Courtney Kardashian to find that the mother-to-be would have been another woman victimized by abortion if she hadn't found some pro-life Web sites:

"I was just sitting there crying, thinking, 'I can’t do that,'" she says. "And I felt in my body, this is meant to be. God does things for a reason, and I just felt like it was the right thing that was happening in my life." (Emphasis added.)

OK, that's enough to soften the heart of McCain The Merciless. And Ms. Kardashian is entirely correct. There are no accidents. And, despite the odds, it's possible that God may even be able to do something with that scumbag boyfriend. (After all, I used to be a Democrat.)

Remember what Jesus said to the women caught in adultery, after he'd saved her life from the accusers who would have stoned her: "Go, and sin no more." Some people, eager to lecture us about not being "judgmental," always seem to forget that last part.

BLACK MONDAY LOOMS?

OK, maybe it's not that bad. But in the three months since we've been doing NTCNews.com -- where financial news is something of a specialty -- I can't recall ever seeing the "sell" indicators all lined up quite so perfectly.

Instapundit's enjoying the gloom and doom, but if you think the economic indicators look bad, just wait until I post the cultural forecast: "40% chance of widely scattered fire and brimstone . . ."

VIDEO: Pro-Obama town hall disrupter's actions speak louder than words

In Tucson, Arizona:

The Tucson area Tea Party Coalition held a meeting at Rincon High School in Tucson this weekend.
The pro-Obama thug disrupted the meeting screaming-- marched to the front of the room holding a sign------
And, then SLAMMED AN ATTENDEE IN THE FACE with his elbow!

More at Gateway Pundit and Tucson Tea Party.

Meanwhile, Arizona Democratic Rep. Gabrielle Giffords is planning health-care town halls tonight and Tuessay:

The events are open to the public, but Giffords' office asks that those who want to attend make reservations by phone or send an e-mail specifying which session they plan to attend.
Today's forum is set for 6 p.m. at the Buena Performing Arts Center, 5225 Buena School Blvd., in Sierra Vista. Reservations: 1-520-459-3115 (long-distance from Tucson) or RSVPGiffords.CochiseCounty@mail.house.gov.
The other two forums are scheduled for Tuesday:
• 9 to 11 a.m. at the West Social Center, 1111 Via Arcoiris, in Green Valley. Reservations: 881-3588 or RSVPGiffords.GreenValley@email.house.gov.
• 6 to 8 p.m., Sahuaro High School, 545 N. Camino Seco, Tucson. Reservations: 881-3588 or RSVPGiffords@mail.house.gov.

Perhaps readers in Arizona will want to contact Ms. Giffords' office and ask if there will be Obama thugs on hand at these meetings to make sure everybody has a chance to get elbowed in the face.

Speaking of Arizona, my friend Barbara Espinosa -- "Grandma Is An Angry Mob" -- has a report on how they greeted the pro-Obama crowd last week in Phoenix:

Organizing for America left the Electric Union building in Phoenix tonight to tour America in a custom designed and painted bus in an effort to counter the grassroots movement against Obama's socialized healthcare bill. . . .
Grassroot protesters received notice 24 hours prior to the rally to get your signs together don't forget to bring water and let's roll. For short notice temp of 108 we made a very good showing. Every time they chanted we want healthcare now we shouted NEVER.

Barbara's blog is American Freedom.

In Memoriam: Sen. Edward M. Kennedy

"The victory for Edward Kennedy is demeaning to the dignity of the Senate and the democratic process."
-- New York Times, editorial in response to
Kennedy's first Senate election, 1962

"Kennedy and Kopechne were part of a group of 12 that had come to Chappaquiddick for the Edgartown Regatta and a private barbecue afterward. Half the guests were married men, half were single women in their 20s. Kennedy and Kopechne left the party at some point that evening and ended up driving off the bridge."
-- Jeff Jacoby, Boston Globe, 1994

" 'Accident,' yes. Yet when a man guzzles booze all day and then drives off a bridge, it is certainly not an unavoidable accident."
-- Robert Stacy McCain

"Though Kennedy managed to extricate himself from the car and get back to his motel that night, Kopechne remained in the car until her body was recovered by a Fire Department diver at 8:45 the next morning. To the diver, Capt. John Farrar, it was clear that she had neither drowned nor died quickly. Kopechne survived for some time by breathing a pocket of trapped air, finally suffocating to death when the oxygen ran out. When Kennedy reported the accident to the Edgartown police, it was 9:45 a.m. -- some nine or 10 hours after he left Kopechne in his car."
-- Jeff Jacoby, Boston Globe, 1994

Capt. John Farrar, interview with Howie Carr, 1994:

"Mary Jo Kopechne wasn't a scion of one of American's wealthiest families; she was just a girl from an average, middle class family, whose idealism led her to Birmingham, Alabama, during the Civil Rights era . . . We'll never know, of course, what direction her life would have taken, but given her apparent passion for politics, she might have become a powerful political figure in her own right."
-- Paula, The Sundries Shack

"I think he’d be the last person who would want us -- those he left behind -- to be morose and full of bathos. . . . He’d probably have a joke to tell . . . One of his favorite topics of humor was indeed Chappaquiddick itself."
-- Ed Klein, friend and biographer of Ted Kennedy

"On this day, every patriotic American should mourn the death of a liberal activist who diligently labored to continue the Kennedy family's noble legacy of public service. Until the day she died in 1969."
-- Robert Stacy McCain

"This letter which details Senator Edward Kennedy's offer to help the Soviet Union defeat Reagan’s efforts to build up the nuclear deterrent in Europe was unearthed . . . after the KGB files were opened . . .

"Kennedy believes that, given the current state of affairs, and in the interest of peace, it would be prudent and timely to undertake the following steps to counter the militaristic politics of Reagan . . . In this regard, he offers the following proposals to the General Secretary of the Central Committee of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union Y.V. Andropov . . ."
-- Committee on State Security of the USSR, May 1983

"When President Reagan chose to confront the Soviet Union, calling it the evil empire that it was, Sen. Edward Kennedy chose to offer aid and comfort to General Secretary Andropov. On the Cold War, the greatest issue of his lifetime, Kennedy got it wrong."
-- Peter Robinson, Hoover Institution

"Edward M. Kennedy became a laughingstock the old-fashioned way: He earned it."
-- Robert Stacy McCain

Allahpundit will hate this

Amazing what turns up in the algorithms:

Does God exist?
Here are six straight-forward reasons to believe that God is really there.

Completely random coincidence . . .

Of course, the will of the people is not the goal

by Smitty (h/t Insty)

Rasumussen says that between half and two thirds of whoever they surveyed would scuttle the sitting Congress, as a whole, outright if they could.

We institutionalize the concept by configuring things such that, as a whole, Congress is always on the outs:

Every Congress must win approval from two thirds of the state legislatures in the 18th month of the Congress, or none of the members of the Congress are permitted to run for re-election for their current seat. Obviate the prisoners dilemma of voters, who, under the current rules, are inclined to build seniority by re-electing nitwits.

Of course, that was written before I had seen the Jacksonian handwriting on the wall. You can expect to see your Political Class, Democrat and GOP alike (where you can differentiate) sound like John Batchelor in their condescending dismissal of anything threatening their gravy train. The threat of having to work for a living, being accountable, and having their prestige besmirched is abhorrent to these people who are, as a whole, neither truly civil nor servants.

Update:
Related BlogProfferings, including a clip of "Fools on the Hill".

Update II:
Cassy Fiano on board.

Russ Smith, Internet Genius

This headline bids fair for a place as Rule 6:

Robert Stacy McCain is very concerned about Andrew Sullivan's circumcised [noun]

Brilliantly combining Rules 2, 4 and 5, with a bit of homophobia thrown in for good measure. NTTAWWT.

Here I labor diligently to ensure that I get more "Established Men" ads in the rotation and -- by turning Rule 2 against me -- the evil mastermind of Splice Today obligates me to use the name "Andrew Sullivan," which automatically triggers the "meet gay singles" ad rotation. (I've reverse-engineered the algorithm.) Heaven knows what the algorithm will produce if I throw in Conor Friedersdorf, but I must consider the trade-off between traffic and click-through.

At any rate, there is nothing on earth that concerns me less than Sully's [noun]. Yet ever since Hannah Rosin brought it up, it seems to be all anyone wants to talk about.

Can we talk about Christina Hendricks, maybe? We now return you to your regularly scheduled VodkaPundit.

Of Gnats and Elephants

"It’s a nice day today, and I have other things I could be doing that are more enjoyable and productive than batting around Conor Freidersdorf."
-- Jimmie Bise, The Sundries Shack, speaking on behalf of the entire conservative blogosphere, which now should turn its attention to more significant targets

Like Belshazzar: The Self-Destruction of Rep. Diane Watson (D-Havana)

"Whittaker Chambers . . . wrote that the crisis of the Western world exists to the degree in which the West is indifferent to God, the degree to which it collaborates in communism's attempt to make man stand alone without God. And then he said, for Marxism-Leninism is actually the second-oldest faith, first proclaimed in the Garden of Eden with the words of temptation, 'Ye shall be as gods.' The Western world can answer this challenge, he wrote, 'but only provided that its faith in God and the freedom He enjoins is as great as communism's faith in Man.' "
-- Ronald Reagan, March 8, 1983

What's wrong with Marxism? And what's wrong with a member of the U.S. Congress praising Fidel Castro? To begin with, as I said, it is a repudiation of the American founding. Our nation was not established by theoretical philosophes, and it did not grow strong and flourish by heeding the flattering "words of temptation."

America is not, has never been, and never will be perfect. It is a drastic misreading of the preamble of the Constitution to suppose -- as so many intellectual idiots have done -- that we are charged with pursuing "a more perfect union" like Dorothy and her friends skipping down the yellow-brick road to Oz.

Knowing that perfection cannot be achieved by human effort in this fallen world, yet we survey the globe and scour the pages of history to find that nation which has ever been so privileged, so honored, so generously graced with God's blessings. Though such grace can never receive from mankind its full recompense of gratitude, we may inquire whether any nation has ever done so much to spread those blessings to so many, as has the United States of America. And what blessing could be greater than liberty?

Yet it is this precious blessing which Diane Watson would have us forsake. For what is Marxism, except the abnegation of liberty? Ms. Watson invokes the specter of racism -- a dishonest insinuation that should not intimidate men and women of goodwill -- and thus reminds me of David Horowitz, the ex-Marxist who has aptly described the communist philosophy as universal racism.

Socialism is the antithesis of philanthropy, even though the advocates of socialism repeatedly proclaim their philanthropic motives, so that like the Pharisees, priests and scribes of ancient Jerusalem, they may be praised as virtuous humanitarians because of the good intentions with which they pave the road to Hell.

Do you not see, Ms. Watson, that with your praise of Fidel Castro and his murderous henchman Che Guevara, you have already wrought your own destruction? Do you think that you own that seat in Congress, that it is your personal property, to do with as you wish? Do you suppose that there is no one -- not a single citizen of your district -- who could defeat you in an election?

There have been many like you before in history, Ms. Watson. One such, imagining himself indestructible, was congratulating himself and celebrating his good fortune with his colleagues, when he received a mysterious message.

Just now I have realized that I have been paying you, the representative of the Third Congressional District of California, an unintended measure of disrespect. For in researching your life, I discover that you achieived the highest degree of educational attainment and that it is my honor to address Dr. Diane Watson.

Understanding that I address such an eminent scholar, I therefore assume your mastery of history both ancient and modern, and your knowledge of many languages. Thus, in considering your special field of expertise, I am certain the message which was so mysterious to your predecessor will to you be elementary, Dr. Watson:

Mene, mene, tekel, upharsin.

You do know Aramaic, don't you, Dr. Watson?

* * * * *

(This is the second part in a series. Readers are encouraged to hit the tip jar. Expect further updates . . .)

Brunswick Trailer Park Murders

From First Coast News:

BRUNSWICK, GA -- Police have identified - and arrested - the person that called 911 yesterday after finding seven murder victims in a mobile home at the New Hope Plantation mobile home park.
Glynn County Police Chief Matthew Doering said Sunday morning that police are holding Guy Heinze Jr., 22, in the county jail for possessing marijuana and other drugs. Heinze's arrest is not related to the homicide, but it is related to the case itself, he said.
Heinze was the 911 caller that alerted police to the scene; he is related to one of the victims found in the home, police said.
The charges are possession of a controlled substance (Darvocet), possession of marijuana, tampering with evidence, and obstruction of an officer, which is related to making false statements to police.

This was the first news I saw on TV this morning. Seven people dead in a trailer park in Georgia. Gruesome. The arrest of Heinze does not make him a suspect. It looks like murder-suicide:

Police are investigating the deaths of seven people found Saturday in a mobile home as a murder-suicide involving mostly members of one family, a law enforcement source familiar with the investigation told the Florida Times-Union.
The law enforcement source and a woman familiar with the victims and the trailer park in the New Hope Plantation, said most of the victims were family members of Rusty Toler, a hard-working, soft-spoken man who loved his children.
Toler and three of his four children are among those dead, while a fourth child is hospitalized in critical condition, said the woman who knows the family. Another gravely wounded victim, said to be a grandchild of Toler's, is also hospitalized, the woman said.

Will try to keep an eye on this as more details develop.

On the subject of silly nicknames

by Smitty

Commenter 'Random' inquires concerning the whole Porch Manqué schtick.

First, I'll point you to Wikipedia, which discusses the term.

There used to be a bit on that page saying that Robbie Williams had been alluding to "manqué" on the track "Me and My Monkey" off of Escapeology.

This cut is a silly, over-the-top shaggy dog story. Note that it ends with an F-bomb at ~7:20. Other than that, it's a hoot, and worth watching in the HQ mode for better audio:

By putting "porch" in front of "manqué", we get a distinct handle. When first invited to be Vice Deputy Assistant Under-Secretary to the Spitoon Wrangler on this blog, I wanted to have a term to explain the relationship between Stacy and me. If I completely tubed a post, that was because I was an embarrassment; a failure.

The term "porch" allows all sorts of (hopefully comic) allusions to toiling away in abject squalor.

There is also the bit that the term veers quite close to a racial slur. Having served several years in the military, I'm about as un-racially biased as anyone. To the extent that every time I use it, I can play the Alinsky Rule #5 card and mock the ignorance of racism, it's a good thing.

Of course, every time you use the symbol, you exhaust a bit of its meaning. One day, Porch Manqué Productions may collapse into PMP. Nature of the symbolic beast, really.

Rule 5 Sunday

by Smitty

It's our first Sunday after Kopechne Day, where we will celebrate the loveliness that wasn't cut off in tragic fashion.

• We'll start off with Stephen Green, the VodkaPundit. The VP links a quote about Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman helping each other learn the alphabet, or something. This blog re-affirms its commitment to education. Especially the classics. And the parodies of the classics. Say, OediPOTUS Wrecks. Which didn't even make #10 on The Week in Blogs. It's not you, Stephen. It's me. I'll try harder next time. *mope*
• The Naval Institute Blog has some WWII-era cheesecake on a Liberty Ship.
• Troglopundit must be going into spawning season. Here is a Miss Universe post. Then there is Jessica Biel. Jessica was forsaken, however, for Elle McPherson. It was a tough call for him, but nothing says 'amphibian' like a surfboard. He free associated from a Space Shuttle launch to Liv Tyler. Spawning season.
• PowerLine offers a Miss Universe retrospective with the kind of thoroughness and attention to detail you respect and admire from the better sort of barrister.
• Rightofcourse slides some Marylin into a general spleen dump.
• Morgan Freeberg has several items of interest. Hot For Words is first. Continuing his pair-wise walk of the alphabet, he features Carly Zucker and Daniella Sarahyba. He had a 5:00 clip of a Spider Man episode, mostly for reasons spelled "Joanna Cameron". Then, disaster struck. There was an error in the pairwise comparison algorithm, and Freeberg was forced into debug mode. He revisited Carly and Daniella. I won't spoil the analysis of the log file.
• Bob Belvedere takes us back with Yvonne Craig to a time when a lady painted green was some kind of exotic turn-on. At the time, I was too young to even understand what turned-on was. This added to the exotic factor. He also suggests Anita Ekberg.
• Manolo the Shoe Blogger (what's in *your* RSS reader?) has Mary Louise Parker with a leg having curves of beyond mathematical perfection.
• Fishersville Mike features Ravens Cheerleaders.
• Three Beers Later submits a 1980s workout video. My dad used to be a huge fan of these. He'd sit there with a cup of coffee in his La-Z-Boy and take in several. "Dad, I think you're defeating the purpose of the video", I'd say, coming back from having slung the Seattle Post-Intelligencer, back when newspapers didn't suck. "Cardio, son: cardio," he said, touching his heart. TBL also features Nancy Sinatra. Then he links a clear and present danger to Western Civilization: a convergence of country western and gansta rap. We'll have to let the market be the judge. And I think it an argument in favor of capital punishment. YMMV.
• Jeffords is trying to disclaim all prior knowledge of Padma Lakshmi. Like he doesn't have that burger commercial fave'd on YouTube. You're fooling no one, buddy.
• PDBWatch is new to the scene. We typically don't go much for photoshopping, but this is so well sold:

  This picture of Megan Fox is a perfect metaphor for Hollywood. It looks pretty until it opens its mouth, and then all the shark teeth come out and threaten to bite your head off.

• Eric S. Raymond is also unknown in these parts, but I totally admire the guy on so many levels that we'll link Lydia Guevara.
• WyBlog introduces tropical storm Dannii (Minogue).
• The Classic Liberal treats us to Christina Aguilera in one of his usual, thorough studies.
• Nation of Cowards keeps the patriotic theme alive.
• Marilyn Maxwell is on Paco's mind this week.
• Dustbury contributes a Haynes girl. I may have an update on this person. Check back.

Well, the ladies had no contributions this week. From a heterosexual standpoint, that's no big deal, but from a maximizing participation and light fun angle, it's not what it could be. So send updates to Smitty. Pray for peace.

Shorter Eleanor Clift

Thank God for historical ignorance!

The city editor at a small daily in Iowa sent a reporter out last week to gather reminiscences of Senator Kennedy. "Be sure to ask about Chappaquiddick," he said, a request that drew a blank look. The young reporter had no idea what he was talking about. When this story was related to me by the editor's wife, who is a baby boomer steeped in Kennedy lore, I thought how relieved the Kennedy family must be that a generation of Americans doesn't automatically reflect on the tragedy that for so long clouded Ted Kennedy's life and career.

As for how this tragedy "clouded" others, well . . . Mary Jo Kopechne could not be reached for comment.

Could apply to any political figure...

by Smitty

...but if anyone knows how to get ahold of Page Hamilton, I'd be curious if he had Ted Kennedy in mind when he wrote this:

Affected by what
You had lost
They're not the habits
You'd protect at any cost

Blur the details
Of your hand
Anything your
Barren conscience
Can't defend

The limits of
Attention span
Successive thoughts
You don't have
But you still pretend

Keep on talking
Anyway
Protected by what you
Know no one will ever say

Because
You can't
Be pure
You're self-assured

Oh, and here they are, growling it out on YouTube.
I know Stacy doesn't do thrash, but Helmet is thinking man's thrash.